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9 December 2012: Married in Washington State. Finally we are a legal family after the legislature, governor and citizens voted for an approved marriage equality. We were like young kids sitting in our sports chairs outside the government offices until the office opened. We were the first in line in Island County to receive the license and then married in a wonderful setting on the first possible day 9 December 2012 in home.

20 September 2011
It has been years since I added to this homepage. It has been 21 years since I first challenged the military's antigay policy. Over 14000 continued to lose their military careers, thousands more participated in efforts for repeal on the DADT law. After 17 years in a lame duck session on 20 Dec 2010 President Obama signed the bill to repeal the ban and nine months later on 20 September 2011 the repeal of DADT was finalized.

No longer do gay and lesbian service members have to serve in silence, lie and live a lie denying their humanity, their orientation, or their partners and families.

Celebrating in Washington DC felt like a surreal experience as gay and lesbian service members introduced themselves and their partners and said they no longer had to decide between the military or the person they loved.

There is a sense of vindication having challenged the antigay policy in 1989 and still a profound sense of humility of the final success and sadness of the human cost. There is the hope that as the military moves forward on implementing the repeal that those serving appreciate the efforts of those who preceded in this battle. And we won the war!

Previously, we in uniform represented the flag now the flag represents us!


I am delighted that you dropped by to visit, whether to read my thoughts, ideas or ranting and ravings about the good and the bad from my world view. Feel free to drop me a note or join in the message board so others can partake and respond to your thoughts and my responses.

After my military case became public as I challenged the military's anti-gay policy, life changed. It followed with Serving in Silence, my autobiography, which was written with Chris Fisher in 1994, and suddenly there was a huge extended family. When Glenn Close became Colonel Cammermeyer in the movie Serving in Silence, produced by Barbra Streisand, Glenn Close, Craig Zadan, Neil Meron, Cis Corman, suddenly I was a movie star. With this came responsibilities I had never anticipated. One of the responsibilities was to continue to speak out on behalf of the gay and lesbian service members who now serve in the military under an unjust Don't Ask, Don't Tell law. Another responsibility was the need to continue to challenge the anti-gay rhetoric in society, the ignorance, and the notion that, somehow, as gay and lesbian people we should be judged by another's God.

I have learned that "If I am uncomfortable, it is where I need to be." It is only by challenging others with our humanity that we will become human in their eyes. I will continue to speak out and I hope you do too.

So, as you visit me, feel free to comment, challenge, make suggestions or just say hello.

Grethe Cammermeyer, RN, Ph.D, COL, USA Ret


SERVING IN SILENCE, the book, is available at Authorhouse. SERVING IN SILENCE, the film, is available on DVD from retail outlets or both can be ordered through me at
2 Mar 2007 Son, Andrew, was killed in a tragic snowmobile accident in the Cascade Mountains. At 32 he had touched so many lives with his love, passion, and gift of himself. He will be forever in our hearts as Diane and I grieve with his wife and brothers. (9 Mar 07)

We have opened an Adult Family Home and provide 24 hour care and health promotion to our residents. For information contact me at See pictures of the home and client resident area on this web site. (10/25/07)